You too can grow up to be a trophy wife!

We've all seen those incredible aerial shots: massive crowds of women in American cities and around the world, marching to protest what they see as Trump's anti-women thoughts, behavior, policies and cabinet appointments.

But despite all this there's one real fact that no one can deny. Melania Trump's a knock-out!

Yes, girls! In Trump's America you may not control your bodies or join the cabinet (unless you have a sex and age change to become an old white man), but there is still one great achievement you can dream of.  Trophy Wife. 

The beautiful and very sexy Melania should inspire us all. 

Not since Justinian's wife, the energetic former dancer Theodora, who inspired Procopius' hilariously mean-spirited Secret History, has the world witnessed such a rise of fortunes.

So throw off your glasses, girls! Drop those boring books! Anyone with a pair of eyes can see what counts in today's America!